Small tour of my new home PICS

Tomorrow we were supposed to have the closing on our new home, only now it's been extended until the 25th of May. I hope that everything is done by then, and we can close already. I am just a little anxious to be in my own home once again. I'm packing, and trying to get everything done so that our move is as easy as possible, but I know it will be a pain once it actually happens. Moving plain and simply sucks. Thank goodness I don't anticipate another one for a very long time.

I would like to show you just a few pics of the house.
The main floor, has lots of arches throughout, and the windows have the same arches too. There's lots of molding on this floor too, and the whole house was freshly painted, and had new carpets installed. Although I'm not too crazy about the carpets, especially on the main floor, for now, they are staying, especially since they are new. The floors could use a good polish, but the fact they are banged up a little doesn't bother me at all. They are good wood floors, and I'm happy with them as well.

This is the foyer. We just walked in the front door. The dining room is to the right.

This was the day we had the inspection done on the house, so all the kids were chilling with me there. Every room is so full of natural sunlight, I just love that. Every window has a beautiful view.

The kids are lying down in the dining room. To the right is a sitting room.

The sitting room. The front door is too the right.

Aren't those arches lovely? I can't wait to see how I can get creative with these walls.

You all know how I'm constantly trying to organize my pantry. Well this one, is practically walk in. I'm sure I'll have lots of fun organizing this one too.

The kitchen is rather large, and I have built in oven and stove. Never had that before. I must say it sure does create lots of extra storage space, which is nice. The cabinets, are in great condition, clean, and extra long, so I don't have any storage issues here. I would like to upgrade those appliances eventually, but lets see how that goes. Have you checked out the price for built ins lately. I about fainted!!!

This is our living room. My husband, and brother say the TV must go on top of the fireplace. I'm saying no, and the TV will go on the wall to the left. What do you think?

Another wonderful window, letting in tons of light.

My kids dancing around, hehe.

The kitchen, and breakfast nook. I like it :)

This is the princess's room. She's kinda spoiled being the only girl. She gets a BIG walk in closet, a remote control ceiling fan, her own bathroom, and an incredible bay window.

Isn't that pretty? She does have one of the best rooms in the house. Lucky girl :)

I'll finish off todays tour with my laundry room. Which I couldn't be happier with. It's upstairs, next to all our bedrooms, hello, wonderful!! Oh and look at that beautiful WINDOW. Oh man, that is just awesome, even in my laundry room I get natural sunlight, and fresh air. How awesome is that?

I have TONS more pictures to show you. Can you tell, I'm pretty excited? This will be a long summer indeed. Moving, unpacking, gardening, and trying to fit in a vacation or two as well, lol. Let's see hwo everything goes!!!

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Breastfeeding : TIME magazine cover

I JUST saw a couple comments on facebook about the new TIME magazine cover, that has the whole country talking. The comments, were for the most part negative, and even went as far as to refer to the cover as child porn, and totally gross. I was really shocked, and VERY saddened to see this kind of reaction.  Obviously the picture was taken in a way that would get reactions, OK. I doubt that she seriously nurses her son like this in public, or even at her own home. It was a photo shoot, yes, but much more that that. It was meant to get us talking, SO LETS TALK!!!

I remember a couple years ago I watched a documentary, about an English woman who was still nursing her 9 year old girls. I watched that and thought, OK, yes, maybe that's a bit extreme, and while maybe that would not be something I would do, I didn't at any point think it was porn, or totally gross. The girls obviously weren't bothered by it, and clearly their mom wasn't bothered by it, and so who was I, or anyone else to say that they should be bothered by it.

As a mother who COMPLETELY believes in breastfeeding, as THE VERY BEST thing you can do for your child, between having 3 kids, I was breastfeeding for nearly 7 of those years. That's a whole lot of breastfeeding in my lifetime.

My first child nursed for the shortest of them all, not because either one of us wanted to stop. The only reason I stopped with him was because, while nursing one day he fell asleep with my breast in his mouth as babies do, and while he was dreaming he bit down so hard he drew blood from my nipple. I'm talking he really bit the crap out of it, and after that, I was so scared, and couldn't think of that pain again. Besides that one had to heal, and you know walking around with one breast full of milk, while the other is shrinking just didn't appeal to my young self back then. I was only 20, and maybe if that happened now, I would handle it different, but I did my best even then. He breastfed an entire year before that happened.

My second child nursed for 2 1/2 years, until I was in my second trimester with my 3rd child. I started weaning her ever so slowly for a couple months before that, but she just wouldn't have it.

My third child, bless his heart, he nursed for 3 1/2 years. I thought he would never stop, but the day came when he too, called it quits. For the record, both my youngest continued to ask for it, ON OCCASION even much after they stopped. Yes, there was no more milk, and yes they had practically forgotten how to suckle, but it was a bonding moment, that nothing compares too. It was a comforting thing for them, even if it only lasted 20 seconds. I didn't make a big deal of it, and they felt incredibly happy for it. I was so thankful that I could STILL comfort them in such a wonderful way, and honestly I wish I could still do that to this day, lol.

Life was so simple when popping my boob in my childs mouth would solve ANYTHING. Seriously it was the best medicine, and ultimate cure for anything that came our way.

I was never one to cover myself with big huge blankets, or sheets, or other stuff. I never had an issue nursing anywhere, and IF someone gave me a look, I would just smile. I was very confident, and it showed, so nobody really ever gave me a hard time about it. Although practically everyone I know, including most of my family and friends, DID think I was a bit weird. I never let it bother me though, and would always tell them how wonderful it was, and how HEALTHY it is for a child.

My thoughts have always been like this, and although I strongly believe that breastfeeding is THE ONLY way for me, I must also remember that many might NOT be ABLE to do so, for various reasons, and then of course there are those who choose not to do it at all, or just for a very short while. It's all good people. I don't judge, whatever works for you, but if you know me, and if I know you, no doubt you will hear me ramble ON and ON about the benefits of breastfeeding. I do believe in it very much, and I have no problem telling the world.

So what are your thoughts on this? I can already imagine that most of you will think that extended breastfeeding is a bit extreme, and that's ok, but try to be respectful even if you don't agree with me. I would be happy to discuss the topic with you, but not if you will be mean about it :)

Oh and having a supporting husband, is most helpful. I can't imagine being able to do this, if you don't have a husband who completely agrees, and supports you. So I was blessed with that as well. Nobody else really mattered, this was what we BOTH agreed was the best thing for our children, and often he was the one defending me to others.

I know it's not for everyone, but I would have it no other way. Those years I spent breastfeeding were the most amazing years of my life, I absolutely LOVED it, and the bond I created with my children will never go away. If you are thinking about going down this path, I can tell you, IN ALL CERTAINTY you will not regret it. If you have any questions about it, please let me know, I will be happy to help out in any way!!

I will continue my thoughts on this next time, along with co-sleeping. So get ready!!!

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How to catch a snake in your garden.

As I was getting out of the car today after picking up my oldest, I saw a snake in my garden. It was black, with yellowish white stripes, and looked to be about 3-4 feet long. I kinda freaked.

I ran to the garage to get my mom, and my oldest to help me catch it. My kids play in the front yard all the time, and are always playing in the garden, so leaving it there was definitely not an option.

I was almost 99% sure it wasn't poisonous, but didn't know exactly what kind of snake it was. I just knew I had to catch it and get it out of there.

My mom screamed like a girl, haha, my oldest tried jumping ON TOP of my van, so I was left alone to try and catch this thing.

I took a fork like tool from the garden and tried to corner it into a bucket, but I didn't have much success.

We called a critter hotline, they said it was unlikely they could get anyone here fast enough, besides the snake was not dangerous so just leave it alone. YIKES, again, not an option. I can just imagine my kids playing and the snake jump out at them, OMG, yeha they would practically freak out, and even though my youngest LOVES snakes, finding one in the garden that just jumps out, or slithers past you might be a bit much even for him.

Then my mom went to get a neighbor and he finally helped me get him back in the woods where he belongs. He ended up just picking the snake up since we couldn't get it to stay in the bucket.

After he caught it, we called the kids to see it, and pet it a couple times, and off it went back home.

KING snakes are very good snakes to have around the house. They are non-venemous, and help control the rat population. OK, good stuff. Oh and they also eat other venemous snakes, yeah, that's good right. It was a pretty snake, I must admit, but no thank you, NOT in MY garden, ahhhh.

AND even this made me thing of Tiger. Remember THIS post where he was playing with a snake in my garage at my old house? Oh man, I wonder if he would have caught this one too?

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Does cupping therapy work? YES, YES, YES!!

First let me tell you a little story about my back, and how I got here in the first place :)

A little history on my back, it hurts, A LOT.
I've never been in a car accident, never had any major trauma, so I'm not really sure why my back is all messed up, BUT it is. (Oh does giving birth to 3 babies, and breastfeeding for over 7 years have anything to do with it, hmmm, MAYBE).

The middle of my back, my lower back, you name it, it hurts. My neck area, oh wow,  sometimes I just want to dig my fist under my skull to relieve the pressure I feel there, which is pretty much everyday. Instead of having the normal C curve in my neck, mine is practically reversed. Just today I went over my xrays with the chiropractor and he said it was 63 degrees off, YIKES.

Via

What does that have to do with anything. Well, if I don't treat it, I will eventually have a major HUMP BACK, and obviously continue getting nasty headaches, and back pain, all of which I already suffer.

Two days ago I went to the chiropractor, I felt like crap, had a MAJOR kink in my neck for the millionth time, and was fed up, so I went. Felt better, and had another appointment today, and after my TWO MINUTE consultation I was left unsatisfied with his treatment plan, he didn't make me feel confident about anything, and I was not happy.

ANYWAYS, I left the office feeling very unsatisfied, and even though I JUST had a treatment, and a 15 minute massage (which by the way was great for what it was, I mean my kids could karate chop the heck out of my back, and it feels better than nothing) I remembered this place someone told me about one time while I got my nails done. I remember this lady raving about this ROMANIAN massage guy who was beyond amazing, and she went on and on for an hour talking about how he healed her, when nobody else could. She had bad knees, or something, I don't know. BUT I clearly remember that he was AMAZING, and ROMANIAN, so I asked where he was, she told me, and then I forgot all about him, UNTIL today.

I drove around a bit until I found it, and got lucky. Not only was he there, he had an opening, (come to think about it, I probably took up his lunch time, oooops), and after talking with him for 5 minutes I was READY for my first treatment/consultation/diagnosis. Just from talking to him, I felt like he knew more than any doctor, chiropractor, etc I had ever seen. He was SO confident, and practically gave me a 100% money back guarantee that he could make me feel MUCH MUCH MUCH better, of not completely. That's how I felt anyway, you just know when someone knows their stuff, and this guys knew his stuff. HE WAS AMAZING, did I already say that, YES simply AMAZING!!!!!!!!!

Since he specializes in REFLEXOLOGY the first thing he did was touch my feet and he immediately told me my feet were the problem for all my back pain. I have an really bad arch in my foot, and when I walk, most of my weight falls on the balls of my feet, which also explains why I can't stand wearing heels, my feel HURT already there.  Then he found the EXACT FLIIPIN spots on my back and neck that cause me grief every moment of my life. I'm talking like in the first ONE minute. After that he got to work, and pushed, and rubbed, and stretched my back, muscles, and all those knots out until I felt like a train just hit me. This was def not your typical relax, music, hot stone, lalalala massage, this was THERAPY, and it hurt, and it was rough, and I almost had to tell him to stop, BUT I didn't.

The more it hurt, the better it felt when he was done, I mean seriously just when I thought I couldn't take the pain anymore, it went away. Got it, so if you go get a massage, MAKE sure you let them do it HARD, and really REALLY get in there, you will be happy they did.

Ok, then I was ready for my FIRST ever cupping treatment. I've wanted to try cupping for the longest time, and I can't believe my ROMANIAN massage therapist who I just happened to find by chance through a lady at the nail salon, could do this, and not only that he was like an EXPERT. He's been doing this for 30 years, and his mom used to do this on him when he was a little boy in the village in Romania. WOW, I thought only the Chinese did this kind of thing.

So he started placing like 30 cups on my back, he seriously covered my whole back, and it felt weird, I could feel heat, almost a burning, tingling sensation, but no pain. I had no idea what to expect, but I felt like my whole back was being tugged on. Talk about getting the blood flowing.

After about 10 minutes the cups came off, and I could not believe the difference RIGHT away. It was amazing, amazing, amazing. Where did all the pain go, where did all the tightness, and pressure go? Really I could care less, all I know was I could move my neck again, my shoulders, my back. My posture felt like 10 times better, more improved, and even now as I'm sitting here almost 6 hours later, my back is still HOT, like I can feel the blood circulating, literally. I am blown away at how incredible this treatment is.

My back looks SCARY, indeed, and I've seen people at the gym before (mostly asian women) with cup rings on their back, and I always thought I wanted to try that. NOW I have a whole mess of them, and I am proud to show them off, to anyone. Take a look, enjoy, ask questions, I don't mind.

I want to tell everyone how awesome I feel, AFTER ONE SESSION, and recommend this to anyone who is suffering from chronic pain. Seriously just give it a try, you have nothing to lose, and while the marks will remain for several days, and possibly scare everyone who sees them, WHO CARES. You will feel A MILLION times better, I just know it, and that's what matters right.

I can't wait for my next visit with him. I'm sold. What about YOU???

**Disclaimer** Clearly I am not giving out medical advice, please consult your trusted physician. I am simply telling a friend about MY experience with something that brought me a great deal of relief, and I think it can work for you too. I would love to write more about my experience and interest in holistic and alternative treatments, because I'm TOTALLY into it people. I just might become the next CRAZY AWESOME ROMANIAN massage therapist/doctor/holistic healer/whatever you want to call people who can heal without the use of conventional medicine. YUP, that's what I'm all about.

Ok, that's it for now, just wanted to share this very exciting thing with all of you, because it was kind of a big deal to me, and I just had to tell all of you too :)

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It's been over a month....

Hello everyone!! I feel so strange being back on my own blog, it's been literally over a month since I've even taken a look at it. The past month has been hard.

Since losing my cat, I've felt many things. Guilt being #1.

I still can't believe it happened, so quickly. In a flash he was gone, and there was nothing I could do about it. I still replay those moments in my head, and every time I back my car out of that driveway, I shutter, and every time I see the spot where he took his last breath I lose mine.

The night that it happened, my youngest son woke me up at around 3am to tell me, very CLEARLY that Tiger was NOT dead, that he woke up, was walking, AND was very much alive.

It was weird, I can't really explain it. When everything happened earlier that day, he didn't want any part of it, he acted like nothing had happened. I thought he just didn't understand.

That night though, he dreamt of Tiger. He was the one to to see him "wake up in HEAVEN"????
Why not, that sounded pretty good to me :)

It made me cry, he hugged me, and told me everything was ok. Then he told me that even a big bear couldn't hurt Tiger anymore, lol. I told him he was right. Tiger was safe, FORVER, and EVER.

It's been strange not having him around. Everyone has felt his absence. My mom misses him terribly, and she never really cared for animals much, but he was special!!

Here's my big question to all of you....

Am I traitor, that literally the next day after this happened, even with all my grief, and crying, and guilt, all I could think about was getting another little kitten?

I have been wanting to go to the shelter and pick one up SOOOO badly, and have been waiting to do it. Is it too soon, does it mean that I loved Tiger any less? I just know I want another one, maybe two, and I can't wait to hold that little kitty in my hands, and cuddle with it, and make all kinds of new happy memories with it.

Gosh, I can't wait!!!

Also I wanted to say THANK YOU soooo much for all your incredibly messages, you all are so awesome. Every one of them just made me feel at peace, and loved, and if Tiger could read, I'm sure he would be on cloud nine now too, purring away, and rubbing all over you with gratitude. Truly, I am so thankful for all the kind words, they all made me feel much better.

Love you all, and I'll be back this week with some pics of MY NEW HOUSE, that I simply can't wait to move into, because then I can go get my new kitty, among all kinds of other things, I am so excited about. Life is good, even when tragedy strikes, I guess there's always a silver lining somewhere.

Believe it or not, I learned an important truth about myself with Tigers death. That's a LONG story, but I really think I know WHY it HAD to be ME. By letting go of him, I had to let go of many things in my life that weren't very healthy for me, and just realizing those things, has made the world of difference in my life. I've tried very hard this past month to reflect on many things, and hopefully things will continue to look up for me from now on.

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Why GOD, Why? I ran over my cat today!!!!!

RIP TIGER

I don't even have words to express the grief I'm feeling.
The GUILT
The anger, that I am the one who ran over my beautiful cat.
I loved him so much.

He was the BEST FREAKIN CAT EVER, and I will miss him
I will miss him rubbing against my legs everyday
I will miss his BEAUTIFUL green eyes, the most beautiful eyes ever
I will miss him walking with us down the street, EVERYWHERE
Everyone that met him would always say how awesome he was
He was the friendliest cat
He was the best companion
The kids adored him
Even my mom who is not a pet person, LOVED him so much

He ran out of food yesterday, and my mom must have reminded me a million times to get Tiger food
So yesterday and today he got spoiled with whole albacore tuna, I was just joking that he loves running out of food, because thats when he gets the yummy stuff :)

Just this morning, my mom and I watched him as he devoured his food
He was so beautiful, we loved on him SOOOO much today

I just can't believe he's gone

Right before my eyes, I saw him take his last breath

It's just unbelievable. WHY me, WHY did I have to be the one to take his life

I just couldn't stop shaking, the kids ran out to see, and everyone was screaming, crying, I just killed him, I just killed Tiger

It was supposed to be a happy day, everything was perfect, I was heading to the gym for my yoga class and to go rock climbing with the kids

If I had left a minute earlier, if I had left five minutes later

If I didn't leave at all

If I had looked behind my van, like I always do.

This time I only saw the kids bike to the side, and I don't know why, but I never checked for the cat
WHY DIDN'T I CHECK for the cat?

WHY

WHY

WHY

The kids said he was sitting in the driveway cleaning himself just minutes before we left
I called them all to hurry and get in the car
We were all thinking about the gym, rock climbing, and NOBODY thought about Tiger

I'm sorry baby, I'm SOOOOOOOOOO sorry.

I love you, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU, LOVE YOU with all my heart!!

I took some pictures of him, I will miss him always.

This is the hardest it's ever been on me to lose an animal. I just can't imagine I could cry so many tears for a cat, but damn it, I LOVED that cat so much, and I FUCKING killed him. How can I ever forgive myself for that?

It's been four hours since it happened, and I haven't stopped crying since. I just can't stop thinking about him, right now, he would have been sleeping on his favorite spot in the garage. We would have called him in for the night, and gave him one last rub before heading to bed.

Now he's dead, and cold in a grave. I feel so guilty, so bad, so sad, so hurt.

All I know is that he didn't suffer.

It happened so fast, I backed up, ran over him, saw him dash to the front of the driveway, and thats when I jumped out of the car, realizing what just happened

By the time I got to him, (5 seconds later) he took his last breath, there was NOTHING I could do.

There was no blood, no visible sign of injury, he just looked like he was sleeping, only this time he would never wake up, and I'm flippin crying like a crazy mad woman all over again, I just can't get the thought out of my head, I just can't stop seeing him. I know he didn't suffer, it was just SO fast.

If there is anything I can be thankful for, it is that!

I'm so sorry everyone, I know this was a terribly sad post, but I just HAD to sahre his story, and what I did. I had to write about it, and get all my feelings out, and I have to share some pictures with all of you, because I loved him, and I always will

He was a HUGE part of our family, there will never be another cat like him, EVER.

My husband said, that you never know why things like this happen, and I know that's the truth.

Would I rather have had him die a painful death some other way, or hit by a strangers car on the road, where he was left by himself, NO of course not.

But this pain is just unbearable, I am 100%responsible, and he never saw it coming. He trusted us so much.

This is just something I can't explain, to know that you are responsible for your animals death.

Oh gosh, my heart is hurting so bad, I miss my cat :(

Do you believe cats, (animals) know when they are loved?
Do you believe they can love you back?

I know Tiger loved us, and I sure hope he knows how much we loved him too, FORVER!!!

 We buried him in my daughters blanket, so he would be forever warm.

We all wrote on this makeshift cross, that just happened to by Dino D's sword. It was from him to Tiger, so he could remember him always.

My mom, bless her heart, she was so strong, and dug the hole, and took care of everything for me. I don't know what I would have done without her, I was just a mess. Shaking, I"M STILL SHAKING, and CRYING, and shaking, and crying :(

The girly, grabbed a kitty from her room, and buried it with Tiger, so of course he wouldn't be lonely. 

 My oldest, gave Tiger his book. Diary of a Wimpy Kid Diary, because it's filled with all kinds of stuff about him, and he thought Tiger should have it. I mean seriously, OMG, these kids are just making me cry even more. We all loved Tiger SO much. DId I already tell you guys that, WE LOVED TIGER!!!

 After he was buried, my mom put a planter on his grave and filled it with flowers. The princess said it was perfect, so he would never be hungry. You know because cats love to chew on grass, and plants :)

 I never quite understood the grief of losing an animal like this, it's so painful.

I just can't believe that he was with us, and now he's gone.

Just the other day I shared a picture of him on facebook, he was so peaceful sleeping on the grass, it was such a beautiful day, everything was perfect.

Now he's gone

I will ALWAYS love you TIGER!!!

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MIHM #4- Organizing my PANTRY - both of them!

Make it Happen Monday!
This week I will finish up my pantries. Yes PANTRIES!
I worked on my Under Stairs Pantry last week, and had a bit of a detour, when I had to play plumber for the day and fix a water leak.

I've pretty much finished that though, and in the process had to work on my upstairs pantry as well. So why not finish that up this week.

Here's a couple more pics at what I'm working on! Oh the joys of getting organized. It's so much fun, like FOR REAL. I'm not being sarcastic :)

This weekend passed so quickly I don't even know where it went. Despite the fact that it was a 3 day weekend for us, it's over now, and I'm feeling lazy as ever.

My little girl is sick, fever, and throwing up. {Frowny Face} No school for her tomorrow, and I'm just sitting in bed with her watching a movie.

I've actually been feeling kinda crappy the past few days as well, especially with a major headache. Sucks. It feels good to have a lazy weekend every once in a while though, he he.

One thing I am doing this week, is taking on a WATER CHALLENGE!
So far today, I've had lots of water, and just finished up two oranges. That def quenched my thirst for juice. I also had some tea this morning, AT HOME.

Will you guys join me as well?
So far I have TWO friends participating.

Ami @ ALILILLY
Lesley @ FABULOUSLY FLAWED

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